[TheForge] Denial won't work -- call 911 if you have symptoms...

[jerry Frost]

You're welcome Bruce, it helped us a lot. Regaining her left hand dexterity
isn't really an oxymoron. She wants to get her left hand working Right
doesn't she? 

It's been 9 years for me and I still have a little smirk when I smile. Makes
me NOT want to go before a judge. 

Good for you Bruce get her snarl up to speed again. You won't have to try,
for stroke and TBI survivors getting a handle on anger can be a real
process. Try not to react, she won't be able to help it. 

Don't beat around the bush trying not to hurt her feelings when you tell her
things. Be nice but be direct, for example: "Stop playing with your food."
"your socks don't match," She cant talk anymore, let's go."

We have issues, I never had a very good off switch, not it's all but gone
entirely. I'll say inappropriate things without realizing it or say
something I THINK is funny and offend or insult folks. 

It's a learning experience for everybody involved, polish up your
observational skills and put on your learning cap buddy, you're both going
to need em.

Just being home will make her feel better and improve the healing. Does she
have a pet? A warm furry laying quietly in your lap makes a HUGE difference.
On some of my bad days I'd doze off and wake up with two dogs and two cats
sleeping in my lap. They know when you need a little loving and come help
you.

Good advice Bruce. Having your affairs in order, living will, powers of
attorney, etc. squared away can keep you out of deep trouble when you
recover or don't. 

My mother didn't fill out a DNR order though she made her whishes plenty
clear to Shannon and myself. Unfortunately the power of attorney didn't
include the power to unplug her. Seeing as I'm still alive Shannon couldn't
make the decision as next of kin it would take both of us so I flew down to
sign the paper and witness her last 15 minutes. 

Living will, powers of attorney, will, DNR if that's your wish, etc. Leaving
it all on your friends or relatives is really painful hard on them. 

Be well Brother. We're pulling for you.

Jer

-----Original Message-----
From: theforge-bounces at mailman.qth.net
[mailto:theforge-bounces at mailman.qth.net] On Behalf Of Bruce .
Sent: Wednesday, October 17, 2018 5:45 PM
To: Blacksmithing List Sponsored by ABANA
Subject: Re: [TheForge] Denial won't work -- call 911 if you have
symptoms...

Thanks, Frosty,
I've just ordered the book.
She's working diligently to get her left-hand dexterity (an oxymoron if I've
ever seen one) back.  There's still a sag in her face, but her smile is
almost normal.  Curiously it's her snarl that's suffered the most, but I'm
sure I'll give her plenty reason to exercise that!
She would have gone home tonight but was just too tired after an all-day
wait for a procedure!  So she'll be going home tomorrow.

Which, BTW, brings up another matter all should consider:  Get your
documents together:  Living Will (a.k.a. Advanced Directive) and Power of
Attorney.  The former tells everyone what you want done to/for you if you're
incapacitated, and who should make any such decisions.  The latter gives
someone you trust the ability to handle your finances (which may be only
while your disabled or at any time at all, depending how it's written).
(You DON'T want some anonymous court-appointed person acting on your
behalf.)  We were fortunate that she had these documents in the works and we
were able to get them signed and notarized while in the hospital.
(The third document, of course, is your will, which needs no explanation.)
Bruce NJ