[SOC] Guanovia

[barry whittemore]

Oh, Crap!
 

> Date: Wed, 4 Dec 2013 06:49:06 -0500
> From: n4bp at bellsouth.net
> To: soc at mailman.qth.net
> Subject: [SOC] Guanovia
> 
> The Incredible Shrinking Entity
> Tim Cotton (N4UM) on December 4, 2013
> 
> Ham radio operators from all over the globe are becoming increasingly 
> concerned over the fate of a small governmental entity located in the 
> furthermost reaches of the South Pacific. For decades the small 
> independent island nation of Guanovia (call sign prefix GR8) has 
> provided joy and excitement to both DXers and DXPeditioners alike by 
> being among the rarest “entities” in the world... Affectionately known 
> to hams the world over as “Guano Reef,” Guanovia continues to shrink in 
> land area as the rich phosphate deposits that comprise the reef itself 
> are being mined and continue to be shipped all over the world as raw 
> materials for fertilizer, explosives and industrial chemicals. Farming 
> interests, international terrorists and large multinational corporations 
> are all vigorously competing to scoop up what little remains of Guanovia 
> before the waters of the Pacific reclaim the reef from whence it rose.
> 
> Millions of seabirds, doing what seabirds have done so very well over 
> centuries, despite their most valiant efforts, are unable to replenish 
> the reef fast enough to keep pace with the modern world's demand for the 
> rich deposits that make up the very fabric of the rapidly shrinking 
> country. Needless-to-say, ham radio operators from around the world are 
> deeply distressed by this state of affairs.
> 
> 
> ARRRL's DXCC Advisory Committee, once again demonstrating their well 
> known leadership abilities, has stepped into the breach and is reported 
> to have started an emergency fund to purchase a small portion of 
> Guanovia before the entire island itself is shipped away on a number of 
> very large bulk cargo carriers owned by a S.MO.M./San Marino conglomerate.
> |
> 
> For the sum of only $10,000.00 (plus shipping and handling) a concerned 
> DXer will be able to purchase 1 ounce of highly compressed genuine 
> Guanovian guano "tastefully" packaged as a commemorative coin with the 
> purchaser's call sign embossed on one side and a “Gooneybird” depicted 
> in mid flight doing his best to replenish the rapidly shrinking reef on 
> the obverse. After very small but necessary administrative costs are 
> subtracted, the balance of funds collected will be put toward the 
> purchase of a 9X12 foot portion of the reef to be maintained in 
> perpetuity as a monument designed to keep “Guano Reef” from sinking 
> beneath the waves and becoming a deleted entity.
> 
> If the program is successful an elite group of carefully chosen, 
> dedicated DXPeditioners will visit the tiny 9X12 foot entity once every 
> year to keep it on the “active list.” Be sure to keep an eye out for 
> their first DXPedition - rumored to be signing GR8POO. Remember, if you 
> haven't worked GR8POO, you haven't worked Guano!
> 
> -- 
> 73, Bob Patten, N4BP Plantation, FL
> 
> E-Mail : n4bp at arrl.net Website: http://www.qsl.net/n4bp
> SOC #1 ARS #799 QRP ARCI #3412 FISTS #7871
> FP #1491 10-10 #3268 SMIRK #6625
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