[SOC] Ferrari fire F1 team

[Ray Goff]

The Ferrari  Formula 1 Team fired their entire pit crew yesterday.

The announcement  followed Ferrari's decision to take advantage of the
British governments 'Work for the Dole' scheme and employ unemployable
Scousers.


The decision to hire them was brought on by a recent documentary on how
unemployed Liverpool youths were able to remove a set of wheels in less than
6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari's  existing crew can
only do it in 8 seconds with millions of pounds worth of high tech gear.

This was thought to be an excellent, yet bold move, by Ferrari Management.

As most races are won and lost in the pits, Ferrari would have an advantage
over every  team.

However, Ferrari got more than they bargained for at the crew's  first
practice session, not only were the Scousers Pit Crew able to change the
tyres in under 6 seconds but within 12 seconds they had re-sprayed, rebadged
and sold the vehicle over to the MacLaren Team for four bottles of Stella, a
gram of speed and
a quick shifty at Coulthard's bird in the shower.



At the cost of ruining the story for some folks, for the liguistically
challenged, here are some translations:

Dole - unemployment allowance paid by the government.
Scouser - somebody living in or coming from Liverpool
shifty - look at
bird - girlfriend