[TheForge] MBS - Yak

[Rob Fertner]

I got this off a newsgroup and even though I don't think it applies to
theforge, those that belong to other lists and newsgroups may find it
helpful.
Rob


THE SANDSTRÖM-HARTWELL MISERABLE BASTARD SCALE (MBS)

The Miserable Bastard Scale, or MBS, was originally formulated on
sci.military.naval for Usenet use. In view of its naval origins, it is based
on the marine version of the Beaufort Scale of wind speeds. The MBS
helpfully allows the numeric classification of Miserable Bastards on
newsgroups.

0: Calm - Individual is dead, medicated, asleep or otherwise unconscious.

1: Sulk - Individual issues "refuse to answer that" responses when views are
challenged.

2: Bristling - The hackles are up, individual takes offence easily but may
still be open to listening to others at this point.

3: Grouchy - ability to interact intelligently is impaired, but this
considered to be normal state of operation.

4: Sputtering - Monosyllabic, impaired receptiveness to views of others.

5: Fresh Breeze - rises to challenges and often breaks into displays of
grouchiness. Expect sudden gusts.

6: Strong Breeze - Long diatribes begin to form. Angry outbursts are
widespread. Conversation obscured by undirected ranting.

7: Near Gale - Rants heap up and strong language from breaking grumbles
begins to be blown in incoherent streaks across the conversation. Visibility
of original subject matter impaired.

8: Gale - Moderately high rant level, diatribes of greater length; Rants are
blown in well-defined streaks in several well-defined directions. Visibility
of original subject matter severely impaired. Personal attacks imminent.

9: Severe Gale - High rant level. Dense diatribes in multiple well-defined
directions. Rants tend to break up under their own force. Speed of furious
typing may result in incoherent output. Personal insults beginning to form
spray. Visibility affected - Miserable Bastard probably seeing red -
original subject matter barely visible.

10: Storm - very high rant level in random directions. Entire conversation
affected. Refusal to acknowledge views of others. Heavy spray of personal
insults and ad-hominem attacks.

11: Violent Storm - exceptionally high rant levels, insults and personal
attacks on all parties, including non-participants. All comments by others
sucked in and twisted out of shape.

12: Hurricane - full-blown apoplectic anger in all directions, original
subject matter and train of thought long ago lost, no trace of logic or
consistency in argument. Others take avoiding action until Hurricane has
blown itself out through being ignored.

13: Coronary Imminent