[SOC] FW: Dear God, from the Dog

[Spencer Sholly]

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Subject: FW: Dear God, from the Dog
 
 
i got this one from my pet group & had to share!  hope you all enjoy it!
 
stephanie





 














































TO:  GOD 
FROM: THE DOG

Dear God:  
Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed? 



Dear God:  
Why do humans smell the flowers, 
but seldom, if ever, smell one another? 




Dear God:  
When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? 
Or is it still the same old story? 




Dear God:  
Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, 
the mustang, the  colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog?   
How often  do you see a cougar riding around? 
We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename 
the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'? 



Dear God:  
If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and 
no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog? 



Dear God:  
We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions, 
hand signals, whistles,  horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, 
electromagnetic energy fields, and  Frisbee flight paths. 
What do humans understand? 



Dear God:  
More meatballs, less spaghetti, please. 



Dear God:  
Are there mailmen in Heaven? 
If there are, will I  have to apologize? 

_________________________________ 

Dear God:  
Let me give you a list 
of just some of the things 
I must remember to be a good Dog. 

1. I will not eat the cats' food 
before they eat it or after they throw it up.   

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., 
just  because I like the way they smell. 

3. The Litter Box is not a  cookie jar. 

4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. 

5. The  garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. 

6. I will not play  tug-of-war with 
Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet. 

7.  Sticking my nose into someone's crotch 
is an unacceptable way of saying  'hello'. 

8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up 
when I'm under the coffee table . 

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur 
before entering the house - not after. 

10. I will not come in from outside 
and immediately drag my butt. 

11. I will not sit in the middle of the 
living room and lick my crotch. 

12. The  cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when 
I play with him and he makes that  noise, 
it's usually not a good thing. 


P.S.  
Dear God: 
When I get to Heaven 
may I have my testicles back? 

'Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened.'
  
 





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