[SOC] Shopping at Walmart

[N0UF]

In line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow 
hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor." 

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. 
"There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine 
sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about 
it.  It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars...a lot cheaper than a 
doctor." 
 
So Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He 
deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine 
sample.He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the 
computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm 
water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.Thank you for 
shopping @ Wal-Mart." 
 
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began 
wondering if the computer could be fooled. He 
mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his 
wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure. Joe hurries back 
to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in 
his concoction, and awaits the results. The computer prints the following: 

 
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.(Aisle 9) 
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) 
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. 
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get 
better. 
 
Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.