[SOC] Southern Signs

[Bill Cunningham]

Nice one.  


----- Original Message ----- 
From: "ng3o" <ng3o@earthlink.net>
To: "SOC" <soc@mailman.qth.net>
Sent: Monday, July 01, 2002 8:06 AM
Subject: [SOC] Southern Signs


> Southern Signs 
> 
> What's Your "Southern" Sign? Some of us (especially Southerners) are
> pretty skeptical of horoscopes, and it has become obvious that what we
> need are "Southern" symbols: 
> 
> 
> OKRA (Dec 22 - Jan 20) 
> 
> Although you appear crude, you are actually very slick on the inside.
> Okras have tremendous influence. An older Okra can look back over his
> life and see the seeds of his influence everywhere. Stay away from Moon
> Pies. 
> 
> 
> CHITLIN (Jan 21 - Feb 19) 
> 
> Chitlins come from humble backgrounds. A chitlin, however, can make
> something of himself if he's motivated and has lots of seasoning. In
> dealing with Chitlins, be careful. They can erupt like Vesuvius. Chitlins
> are best with Catfish and Okra. 
> 
> 
> BOLL WEEVIL (Feb 20 - Mar 20) 
> 
> You have an overwhelming curiosity. You're unsatisfied with the surface
> of things, and you feel the need to bore deep into the interior of
> everything. Needless to say, you are very intense and driven as if you
> had some inner hunger. Nobody in their right mind is going to marry you,
> so don't worry about it. 
> 
> MOON PIE (Mar 21 - Apr 20) 
> 
> You're the type that spends a lot of time on the front porch. It's a
> cinch to recognize the physical appearance of Moon Pies. Big and round
> are the key words here. You should marry anybody who you can get remotely
> interested in the idea. It's not going to be easy. This might be the year
> to think about aerobics. Or - maybe not. 
> 
> 
> POSSUM (Apr 21 - May 21) 
> 
> When confronted with life's difficulties, possums have a marked tendency
> to withdraw and develop a don't-bother-me-about-it attitude. Sometimes
> you become so withdrawn, people actually think you're dead. This strategy
> is probably not psychologically healthy, but seems to work for you. One
> day, however, it won't work and you may find your problems actually
> running you over. 
> 
> 
> CRAWFISH (May 22 - June 21) 
> 
> Crawfish is a water sign. If you work in an office, you're always hanging
> around the water cooler. Crawfish prefer the beach to the mountains, the
> pool to the golf course, the bathtub to the living room. You tend to be
> not particularly attractive physically, but you have very, very good
> heads. 
> 
> 
> COLLARDS (June 22 - July 23) 
> 
> Collards have a genius for communication. They love to get in the
> "melting pot" of life and share their essence with the essence of those
> round them. Collards make good social workers, psychologists, and
> baseball managers. As far as your personal life goes, if you are
> Collards, stay away from Moon Pies. It just won't work. Save yourself a
> lot of heartache. 
> 
> 
> CATFISH (July 24 - Aug 23) 
> 
> Catfish are traditionalists in matters of the heart, although one
> whiskers may cause problems for loved ones. You catfish are never easy
> people to understand. You prefer the muddy bottoms to the clear surface
> of life. Above all else, Catfish should stay away from Moon Pies. 
> 
> 
> GRITS (Aug 24 - Sept 23) 
> 
> Your highest aim is to be with others like yourself. You like to huddle
> together with a big crowd of other Grits. You love to travel though, so
> maybe you should think about joining a club. Where do you like to go?
> Anywhere they have cheese or gravy or bacon or butter or eggs. If you can
> go somewhere where they have all these things, that serves you well. 
> 
> 
> BOILED PEANUTS (Sept 24 - Oct 23) 
> 
> You have a passionate desire to help your fellow man. Unfortunately,
> those who know you best - your friends and loved ones - may find that
> your personality is much too salty, and their criticism will probably
> affect you deeply because you are really much softer than you appear. You
> should go right ahead and marry anybody you want to because in a certain
> way, yours is a charmed life. On the road of life, you can be sure that
> people will always pull over and stop for you. 
> 
> 
> BUTTER BEAN (Oct 24 - Nov 22) 
> 
> Always invite a Butter Bean because Butter Beans get along wellwith
> everybody. You, as a Butter Bean, should be proud. You've grown on the
> vine of life and you feel at home no matter what the setting. You can sit
> next to anybody. However, you, too, shouldn't have anything to do with
> Moon Pies. 
> 
> 
> ARMADILLO (Nov 23 - Dec 21) 
> 
> You have a tendency to develop a tough exterior, but you areactually
> quite gentle. A good evening for you? Old friends, a fire, some roots,
> fruit, worms and insects. You are a throwback. You're not concerned with
> today's fashions and trends. You're not concerned with anything about
> today. You're really almost prehistoric in your interests and behavior
> patterns. You probably want to marry another Armadillo, but Possum is
> another somewhat kinky, mating possibility. 
> 
> 
> Bill NG3O
> 
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