[SMCARA] Ham

[Larry Norris]

You know when you're a Hamaddict when;
§ You wait for a nice snowstorm to build your next antenna. They will always 
work better!
§ Will actually spend 10 minutes listening to the other station describe his 
triple bypass surgery in order to finally get a signal report.
§ Tell the xyl you need a minute to check something on the radio and show 
back up 3 hours later.
§ Spend Valentines Day at Radio Shack looking for 12 volt relays.
§ Read and absorb every word on W8JI'S website!
§ Go to Eham or DX summit before checking your email.
§ Line your birdcage with a complimentary issue of CQ magazine.
§ Have your ham radio activities come up during your divorce proceedings.
§ Venture into your backyard at 2am in 10 degree weather to check for icing 
on your antennas with a spotlight able to be seen from space.
§ Buy a house based on available antenna trees with proper orientation.
§ Quit smoking so your equipment will maintain its resale value.
§ Never read the manual to your new radio till after a week or so, when you 
are totally convinced it might actually be helpful.
§ Don't kick the cat because your final pull up line has found the only 
remaining leaf in your yard and has successfully tangled at 50 ft high in 
your only antenna tree.
§ Have enough buried and knotted up copper wire in your backyard to feed a 
third world country.
§ Have told a nosey new neighbor that you are a NSA volunteer listening 
station.
§ Keep your comments to yourself when the self proclaimed antenna expert 
with crappy audio and a 2 by 2 signal is having an orgasm about his 
multiband 20 ft vertical being able to work Italy, and will share the design 
on his QRZ page.
§ Leave your own Super Bowl party early so you can check your new antenna on 
the greyline.
§ Set up a remote station at work to play with some digital during your 
"free" time.
§ Drive 400 miles to pick up an amp to avoid shipping costs and possible 
damage.
§ Intercept the UPS guy before that new big box ends up on your porch. Lying 
to xyl never a good idea, subterfuge much better method.
§ Always remember to answer "Is that thing in the backyard permanent?" with 
"Of course not, just a quick experiment be gone in a few days" Not.
§ Still working on that antenna book that's going to take care of retirement 
bills.
§ Dislodge a chimney brick while pulling down a stuck homebrew Windom 
because of perceived coupling with wire beam. Turns out to be bad barrel 
connector in the shack!
§ Spend way too much time writing articles for eHam.
Larry Norris
N3JTN  Ham
KAE-4617 GMRS
Leonardtown,Md
A bad day  playing radio is ALWAYS better than a good day working