[SMCARA] From WB9IIE 30 ways to feel more like a Ham radio operator!!!

Thu Jun 4 14:35:02 EDT 2009

Also known in years past as Chief Gary Nelson....

------ Forwarded Message
From: Gary Nelson <wb9iie at sbcglobal.net>

30 ways to feel more like a Ham radio operator!!!

 1. You think a good time is "breaking in" a new part-time Radio Shack
employee with your radio wisdom with..."HEY WERE CAN I FIND THE 300
OHM TWIN LEAD" ?, and then laugh hardly when they look all confused
and dazed..

2. You visually check the skyline for antennas and towers as you drive
down the road... and always think "man those antennas are sure pretty
looking, and I wonder if I can get that vertical of mine higher?

3. You drive by those huge 2000ft TV towers, at the edge of town,and
dream about putting a triband beam on one of them for a upcoming field
day...

4. People constantly have to ask you to turn down the volume on the
radios when they call you on your cell phone in the car or in your
shack....

5. Your ham wife has called you three times for dinner - then she calls you
on the repeater to finally come upstairs...

6. You have or know someone who absolutely needed a radio with
thousands of channels - even though you live in a town with 2 cops and
a volunteer fire department and
a airport with no tower or services...

7. More than 97.3% of the photos in your family album show you with a radio
strapped to your belt or a microphone in your hand, and the only good
photos of you
in your shack...

8. You know a guy who bought a $30 bargain VHF or UHF radio he got at
the hamfest that didn't even come with a tone board.. and he still
loves it...

9. You'd rather sell your family's dog... than give up that beat up
cardboard box of old coax and connectors & parts of junk you have had
sitting in that one corner for 3 years
you have assembled for that one project 5 years ago you still want to
complete soon!

10. It still doesn't matter to you if the antique radio you brought
home from the curbside
was an apartment for mice..,and you think it looks, and smells
great!!! Who cares if it smoked up the house when you tried turning it
on, By god someday your fixing her up !

11. You're not speaking to your elderly neighbor anymore..because last
week just as
you tuned to that rare shortwave dx station...he turned on his power drill
and must have had it going for what seemed like hours even tho it was
for just 30 seconds...

12. Your wife has secretly been talking about an annual garage sale
just to get rid of the
boxes of wire, coax, and power adapters...So you now use your shack
scanner to listen in on her phone conversations, just to head her
off...

13. You have kerchunked so many repeaters in your lifetime you
possible qualify for the kerchunked all repeater award...posthumously
granted to you by the local guys in the club..

14. When going on vacation, the first thing you think about  is
setting up an APRS radio to have your friends and ham buddies track
your daily progress..

15. You take your hand held to work just to see if you can hit any of
the local repeaters from your work center..

16. You acknowledge conversations with your family and friends by saying
ROGER THAT HONEY..  OR...OVER... and they think it's just normal.

17. The total number of radio related books in your home are five times the
total number of all other books and magazines.

18. Besides your ham call plates for your car.. you also have some
ARES or SKYWARN Stickers on your mobile..and you have been eying one
of those flashing orange lights for emergency work, because ya just
never know when it might come in handy...

19. You're local repeater is monitored in your home from at least 3
different locations in the house.. including your bathroom.. until you
close its door... Then you always can cross band in there you figure!

20. Every time a storm goes over you think oh crap that strike was
close, and  wonder if the next ones is gong to be the " BIG ONE THAT
HIT " !!!

21. Your spouse goes to the supermarket while you "stay in the mobile
and talk to the guys on the repeater...

22. You'll spend hundreds of dollars on a brand new rig, and then wander the
hamfest pausing each time you pass the booth selling those $7 embroidered
call sign hats thinking "I wonder if they'll take $5?"

23. When shopping for a new vehicle the first think you look for is space
to mount the radios - you end up sitting in the front seat staring blankly
at the dashboard area, feeling underneath seats, and poking around the
backseat for ways to route the coax. If caught looking under the hood for
holes in the firewall for your power cables, you tell your wife, "Nothing
honey, just checking things under here."

24. The total number of antennas on your house is greater than six other
houses on your block-counting that pain in the a$$ cb'er down the street,
and your thinking about putting up a few more antennas as well..

25. You've considered contacting NOAA offering your XYL's voice as a
substitute
for that awful sounding mechanical computer-generated voice on the NWS
alerts..

26. You tell your smart ass neighbors that the tower and great big HF
beam in your yard is to keep GIRAFFES out of your yard... " SO HAVE
YOU SEEN ANY IN MY YARD SINCE I PUT IT UP??... HMM HAVE YOU...?? "

28. Some of your ham friends have more certificates and licenses on
the wall than your local veterinarian or dentist.

29. Dayton is a far far far away place kind of like never never land
where magical things happen...and dreams are made...

30. All the local hams know your vehicle on sight - and when they
drive by your house honk CQ which ticks off your neighbors and wife...