One 23rd of December, Santa’s doorbell rings. He opens the door and there is a little man there in a blue uniform with a peaked cap.

“Evening!” he says, “My name is Hopkins, Civil Aviation Authority. It’s time for your check ride”.


Santa begs his pardon politely and Hopkins digs through the satchel he is carrying and produces a sheaf of papers. “Checkride,” he says. “You need to be licensed to clear U.S. airspace.”


After some mumbling and grumbling, Santa gives in to the inevitable and gets the sleigh out, harnesses the reindeer and throws a couple of sacks in the back as ballast. He gets in, helps Hopkins up, and just as he is about to crack the whip when he notices that Hopkins has produced a shotgun from somewhere.


“What’s that for?” asks Santa, and Hopkins gives him a knowing look.


“I’m not supposed to say, but since it is you… You’re gonna lose an engine on take-off.”