[K3PZN-List] FW: Presidential Address...

[Frank Rodski]

> Presidential Address (I wish!)
>
> This should also knock the hell out of the globalism movement.  Of
> course, it's just an early draft. . .
>
> - - - - - - - - - - - -
>
> What follows is the text of a presidential address given by President
> Bush on July 4, 2003:
>
> My fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of Iraq's regime has
> been completed. The discovery and destruction of all weapons of mass
> destruction have been covered thoroughly in the press. A new Iraqi
> government has been established and appears to be stable. Our mission
> in Iraq is complete.
>
> This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American
forces from Iraq.  This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now
time
> to begin the reckoning.
>
> Before me, I have two lists.  One list contains the names of countries
which > have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short.
The
> United Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, and Poland are some of the countries
> listed there.
>
> The other list contains everyone not on the first list.  Most of the
world's
> nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies
> of both lists later this evening.
>
> Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those
> nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely.  The money saved
> during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the
> Iraqi war.
>
> The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world
> hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
>
> Need help with a famine?  Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France.
>
> In the out years, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this
> money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home.
>
> I am ordering the immediate withdrawal of all US forces from Kuwait, Saudi
> Arabia, and all other Middle Eastern nations.  Leave us alone. Solve your
> own damn problems. Need help? Call Germany.
>
> On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will
> hunt you down and eliminate you and all your relatives from the face of
> the earth. Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or
maybe
> China.
>
> Regarding the nation of Israel, I have this to say. It seems like
everybody
> has forgotten what happened to European Jewry during the 1930s and World
> War II.  Our nation will never permit the destruction of Israel.  No way,
> Jose. Nevertheless, to Israel and the Palestinian Authority. Yo, boys.
Yank
> yer heads outta rectal defilade and work out a peace deal.  Just note that
> Camp David is closed. Maybe all of you can go to Russia for negotiations.
> They have some great palaces there.  Big tables, too.
>
> I'm ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France,
> Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades.  We are
> retiring from NATO as well. Bon chance, mes amis.
>
> I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN
> diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid tickets
> to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed.  I
> don't give a damn about whatever treaty pertains to this.  Pay your
tickets
> or tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers, and limos be turned
> over to some of the finest chop shops in the world.  I love New York.
>
> A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2.  Since we are going
to
> be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not
pissing
> us off for a change.  Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox and his
entire
> corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I have a couple
extra
> tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I'm gonna put 'em?
> Yep, border security.  So start doing something with your oil. Oh, the
> United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty---starting now.
>
> It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens.
>
> Some will accuse us of xenophobia.  My response is simple and direct: if
> you can play that word in Scrabble, do it as soon as your turn comes
round.
>
> Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them be saying darn tootin'.
> Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the
> world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the
> planet.
>
> It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate
> homelessness in America.  It is time to eliminate World Cup soccer from
> America.
>
> We will develop energy independence. We will restructure our nation for
> its isolationist destiny.
>
> I will be sending legislation to Congress tomorrow proposing the first
> actions that that august body should take as we move in a new direction.
>
>
> Finally, I have decided not to run for a second term of office. The First
> Lady and I will retire to our Texas ranch and have some fun. Laura and I
> have been talking about takin' one of those cruises up to Alaska.
>
> Personally, I could care less who gets elected in 2004. Throw a little
> fascism into the mix and elect Senator Clinton. She can appoint the
> editorial board of the New York Times to her Cabinet.
>
> To the nations on List 2, a final thought.  Drop dead.
>
> To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks guys. We owe you.
>
> God bless America. Thank you and good night.