[HCARC] Perverse Laws Of Nature

[Gary and Arlene Johnson]

Or the "Law Of Selective Gravitation" or better said - "IF YOU DROP A TOOL 
WHILE WORKING ON DELICATE ELECTRONIC GEAR IT WILL ALWAYS FALL WHERE IT WILL 
DO THE MOST DAMAGE."

Gary J
N5BAA
HCARC Secretary 2013

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "H. Vordenbaum" <tower2 at stx.rr.com>
To: "'Gary and Arlene Johnson'" <qltfnish at omniglobal.net>; 
<hcarc at mailman.qth.net>
Sent: Monday, March 04, 2013 6:54 PM
Subject: RE: [HCARC] Perverse Laws Of Nature


> And the Law of I.P.O.I.O.: The Innate Perversity of Inanimate Objects.
> Hv
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: hcarc-bounces at mailman.qth.net [mailto:hcarc-bounces at mailman.qth.net]
> On Behalf Of Gary and Arlene Johnson
> Sent: Monday, March 04, 2013 14:14 PM
> To: hcarc at mailman.qth.net
> Subject: [HCARC] Perverse Laws Of Nature
>
>      The laws of nature are undeniable:
>
>
>      1.Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with
> grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
>
>      2.Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will 
> roll
> to the least accessible place in the universe.
>
>      3.Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly
> proportional to the stupidity of your act.
>
>      4.Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a
> busy signal - and someone always answers.
>
>      6.Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you
> were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every
> time).
>
>      7.Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the
> telephone rings.
>
>      8.Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you
> know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be
> seen with.
>
>      9.Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine
> won't work, IT WILL!!!
>
>      10.Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely
> proportional to the reach.
>
>      11..Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people 
> whose
> seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last.  They are the ones
> who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the 
> toilet
> and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over.
> The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly
> legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The 
> aisle
> people also are very surly folk.
>
>      12.The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee,
> your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is
> cold.
>
>      13.Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker
> room, they will have adjacent  lockers.
>
>      14.Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly
> sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the
> newness, cost and color of the carpet or rug.
>
>      15.Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible IF you don't know
> what you are talking about.
>
>      16.Boswell's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're
> ugly.
>
>      17.Oliver's Law of Public Speaking --A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO 
> FEET!!!
>
>
>      18.Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you 
> find
> a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
>
>      19.Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go 
> to
> the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better.. But don't make 
> an
> appointment, and you'll stay sick.
>
>      Gary J
>      N5BAA
>      HCARC Secretary 2013
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