[Hammarlund] Remember Halli Sunday Net

Duane Fischer, W8DBF dfischer at usol.com
Sat Jun 16 19:47:16 EDT 2012



Please join us for the Hallicrafters 20 meter Net on Sunday June 17th. The

growing grass will wait. Turn the sheep loose on it later about dusk!

The HHI Net is from 12:30 - 2:00 PM EST/EDT, or 1630 - 1800 UTC.

The frequency is still 14.293 MHZ USB +/- for adjacent splatter due to

overmodulation and weak drifting solid state finals!

Here is something for all of you fathers - past, present and future. Enjoy.

That f Day In June

Duane B. Fischer

Today is Father's Day. Traditionally this means that

appreciative children honor their father's by doing special

things for, and with, them. Things like having him over for

a porterhouse steak done medium well on the grill, packing a

picnic lunch and going to the drag strip or taking him to see

a real family movie like Maverick. Of course, this means

that the children do have to take some of their high priority

time and devote it to Dad. Simply put, they have to get

their lazy self-serving buns out of bed before noon and do

something physical the day before Father's Day!

If your children are anything like mine, the word

meaningful does not yet exist in their vocabulary. Nor will

it exist until they become a parent and come to comprehend

that sacrifice is something they just might have to do

themselves! Their greatest mental accomplishment may lie in

an incredible aptitude for creative excuse making. Do any of

the following sound familiar?

"I didn't have any money." Which is hard to believe

when one calculates the cost of all the empty beer cans,

cigarette butts and fast food wrappers littering the back

yard! Either they secretly won the lottory or that pink

plastic elephant bank took a serious hit with a hammer! That

stuff doesn't grow in yards naturally, so somebody bought it.

Haven't they heard of financially planning ahead? It isn't

as if Father's Day comes as a sudden surprise, like diarrhea

after a chili dog. It is always the third Sunday in June.

I don't want to hear about gifts being too expensive. I

don't expect a fourteen caret solid gold four way lug wrench

or hand cut lead crystal glasses to drink Metamusil from.

Hey! McDonalds has regular burgers for $.29. One of those,

the pretty blond fox stuffing the french fry bags and a

medium coke would suit me just fine.

How about? "I was just too busy." Too busy? Ha! More

like could give a rat's rump less what dad does on his day.

Funny how they always seem to find the time to borrow your

favorite sweat shirt, your car and every useful object in

your home that isn't nailed down. Does remembering who was

there when they had the urge to mooch take too much of their

time also? Why is it that they can remember what their best

friend was wearing when they loaned them a cd six months ago

and not recall borrowing money from me two minutes before?

Must be something in the water. Just think what would happen

to a child's credit rating if father's reported unpaid debts

to TRW. Do they think of me and appreciate the clean clothes

they have because I sacrificed my Bahama cruise to buy them a

washer and dryer? Or do they just grumble and whine because

automatic doesn't mean that the dirty clothes wash

themselves? I wonder where they would be if I had been too

busy for them? Perhaps gainfully employed, independent and

better adept at social skills!

How about? "I forgot what day it was." A real original

excuse! Just about as believable as not flushing the toilet

after taking a dump because they were saving water. How

could anyone simply forget Father's Day? There are

commercials on tv hawking everything from Fruit Of The Loom

DAD briefs to do it yourself talking cards. Look on the

calendar! It is clearly marked and circled in large purple

letters highlighting the Dad icon! Not even a complete idiot

could miss it. Your calendar has a nude photo of what on it?

Forget? Impossible! I know they are on a first name

basis with that steroid taking muscle bound bagger in the

express lane at Meijers. There are more Father's Day sale

signs around that place than the sum of the pieces of junk

mail the average person receives in six months. They even

have signs in braille! So what if they are on the bathroom

doors. Saying "I forgot" is a learned childhood all purpose

excuse used by adults too explain away being irresponsible.

This also applies to adult children, who typically have ego's

twice the size of Texas. Guess this is what I deserve for

not being more contraception minded.

How about the time worn catch all cop out. "I was going

to, but I was too tired." I learned long ago that being too

tired is analogous to not giving a damn! Reminds me of

something their mother said a lot every time I wanted to have

sex. Perhaps she had a premonition that they would forget

her on Mother's day. All these years I thought it was some

sort of female hormone problem! Just so they would know, I

looked up being "too tired" in Webster's New Collegiate

dictionary. It defines this state as "shitting in bed and

kicking it out with your feet." I'll bet they weren't too

tired last night to wolf down a double cheese pepperoni

pizza, crank up the stereo, drink beer and pass gas with

their friends. I can understand how spending your last few

bucks on a 1:00 A.M. beer run is more important than getting

their Dad a card for Father's Day. Sure I can. Just about

as well as I can understand how President Clinton's economic

recovery plan helps reduce poverty by eliminating jobs and

unemploying Americans!

Finally, there is my daughter's favorite solution.

Her idea of celebrating Father's Day is either a card or

phone call. The former is generally a day or two late with

postage due or delivered in person while she is on her way

somewhere else. The latter means that right after being

wished a happy Father's Day, I have to listen to her

complain about what a miserable day she is having! I had

never considered myself to be a selfish person, but perhaps I

should have looked a little closer in the mirror. Somehow I

managed to create a daughter who has refined this trait to an

art form. She seems to think that a one dollar and twenty-

five cent generic card, or a ten second message on my

answering machine, fulfills her annual Father's Day

obligation.

Perhaps this commonly forgotten minor Hallmark occasion

should be renamed Father's Moment! Well the cards may be

late and the phone calls brief, but that is better than

receiving salt free potato chips and Diet Coke with no fizz!

I guess it is better to be remembered briefly, like an

aromatic baked bean puffer, then to pass through this life

without even being noticed. Did I just compare myself to the

rotten egg smell of a malfunctioning catalytic converter?

See what children can do to your mind? We now have Crayola

crayons with scents. What's next? A Father's Day card that

belches in your face and smells like Bud Light? I can hardly

wait for next year!



Original: June 11, 2000.



Duane Fischer, W8DBF - WPE8CXO
E-Mail: dfischer at usol.com
Hallicrafters web site: www.w9wze.net
HHRP web site: hhrp.w9wze.net



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